July 19, 2012

Knead You Now

So I knocked something else off my "bucket list" last week: I went for my first massage. I know, "whoa Chui dial it back a notch you wild, wild beast" but seriously, it's been something I've wanted to try first-hand for awhile so it became a birthday gift to myself. You're probably thinking, okay... what kind of an adventure can you have lying on your face for 45 minutes? But oh, you will find out. I mostly signed up for a massage because sitting hunched over at a desk all day hasn't inspired proper posture with me, and I knew my back could use some restorative therapy.

FYI: Some health benefits of massage therapy are:

- Increased blood flow and circulation.
- Release of lactic acid build up.
- Reduction of the build up of scar tissue that make up those achy knots.

So how did I choose a place? I asked a co-worker if she'd ever been for a massage, and fortunately she raved about this guy who won an award out in Saskatchewan for his deep tissue massage. At first I was hesitant to have a boy massage me, but I decided to go for it.


Flash forward to the evening of, the man-massuese greeted me. Soft music was playing in the background, attempts at feng-shui were found in the foyer. I followed him upstairs, and that's when it started to feel like a wedding night. Mind you, I'm a happily single, won't-date kind of girl and I have no experiential right to say that it felt like a wedding night experience. But I have talked to married friends and seen enough movies to know that many people are anxious about the wedding night and its potential for being awkward. That's probably due to all the expectations leading up to it, and other personal things I will leave untouched.

So there we were, this man-massuese and I were standing on a cool laminate floor, the lights were dimmed, and a fan was slowly creaking back and forth. I nervously said, "So this is my first time..." to which he re-assuredly replied, "Oh really? Okay, well don't worry about it we can do just with what you're comfortable with." He then went on to tell me that some people remove most of their clothing, or leave it on and it was up to me and my comfort level. He also told me he would be using lotion, so if I didn't want to get gunk on my clothes it was a better idea to not have them on.

There we were, standing there awkwardly with a bed between us, until I said, "So... do I just take off my clothes and get under the sheets?..." To which he replied, "yeah, I'll just slip out and come back in in a minute." Cool. Man was it awkward when he came back in - I was lying there with the sheets over me, resting my face on this giant donut-shaped cushion. Then he got down to business.

We talked about his award. Which apparently was not awarded to him as an individual, but the company he worked for. It was a People's Choice award, which his company here in Winnipeg also won. Right, that makes more sense. How would one win a deep tissue massage award? Would you have a time limit to massage your clients - last one standing with the least knots wins?

Long story short, apart from the initial awkwardness that the man-masseuse was a man, it was a professional experience and he did a pretty good job working out my aches. Apparently I had a lot in my neck. At one point he asked if I turned my head left a lot. I was like, weird question but GASP how did you know I work a receptionist job and the door is on the left? Apparently tension points reveal a lot about our posture and daily habits, which didn't really surprise me but the specificity of it freaked me out a bit.

So that was my latest adventure. Nothing too crazy and spontaneous. I trust my actual wedding night won't be as awkward, because I'll have known him longer than a combined 5 minutes. And hopefully this post didn't make you uncomfortable, but until next time: don't forget to stretch it out, and drink lots of water to flush out those toxins kids!